# What meaning is Meaning is contained within whatever we call our [souls](humanity.md). We find meaning through [purposes](purpose.md) we do. However, not *all* purposes create meaning. Meaning is the "[why](understanding.md)" we do things. Our indirect sense of meaning comes through relationships. It can be [God](religion.md), [family](people-family.md), or [friendships](people-friends.md), but is attached to our [innate essence](humanity.md). The direct sense of meaning we have control over is derived from [purposes](purpose.md) through a sense of responsibility. Broadly, responsibility is a series of elements: 1. Having the capacity to make [decisions](people-decisions.md)... 2. ...which create [actions](results.md), which may simply be thoughts... 3. ...which accomplish a [purpose](purpose.md) directed toward an object. 4. We've [predicted](imagination.md) the purpose will create [value](values.md) for a living thing, either directly or indirectly. 5. We [believe](understanding-certainty.md) our decision changed the [consequence](results.md). 6. The decision we made should have either prevented a potential [loss](mind-feelings-fear.md) or suffering or increased [satisfaction](mind-feelings-happiness.md). The word "responsible", as used here, is referring specifically to the above. There is often a *different* meaning for the word that means "worthy of blame", and is a matter of [consequences](results.md) (which we can never be entirely responsible for). APPLICATION: Opportunities to [succeed](success-1_why.md) exist wherever responsibility was neglected. Responsibility-based meaning doesn't necessarily come from legitimately changing [reality](reality.md), but instead from the *[appearance](image.md)* of having changed reality. We measure it by whether we [feel](mind-feelings.md) accomplishment. The nature of responsibility also means that we must always conquer the [unknown](unknown.md), which ends up always reverting to some type of [religious theme](religion.md), no matter how secular we become. [Decisions](people-decisions.md) operate independently of [habit](habits.md), so we can only continue feeling meaning by continuing to make conscious choices. Otherwise, we will start to drift from our sense of meaning. [Building new habits](https://adequate.life/habits/) can *be* a choice, and is probably the only choice we can continuously make the same throughout our life, beyond anything regarding [religion](religion.md). From our biological origins, our [gender](gender.md) (i.e., XX or XY chromosome) has a *profound* impact on how we frame meaning. - As beings without any biological configuration, men struggle with the battle to find meaning in a world without their purposes directing toward any inherent utility. Their result is to build, in the hopes of defying reality, and he will face an ugly hardship that develops his [maturity](maturity.md) when he realizes his utter frailty and limitations. - As being configured for reproduction, women struggle to find connection in a generally uncaring world. Their result is to draw connections in the hopes of defying reality, and she will face an ugly trial that develops her maturity when she realizes she's been self-deceiving or in the final solitude that engulfs us all in [death](mind-feelings-fear.md). - Either way, we are all deceived by an overstated deception about our self-capacity, and we have a hard time finding true meaningless in just about *anything*. APPLICATION: We find unbelievable meaning through sacrifice for others, and it's why [parenting](parenting-babies.md) is considered one of the most rewarding jobs, even while it's also mostly unrewarding externally. The second-greatest form of experiencing meaning comes through [creating](creations.md) things that benefit others, with the greatest in *being* someone that someone else [loves](people-love.md). When we *only* consider sacrificing for others' interests, we can find incomparable meaning through [love](people-love.md), especially toward others. Every second, our responsibility-based meaning is subject to change. It can shift from an [emotional state](mind-feelings.md), or from [understanding](understanding.md) something in a new way, or could simply be because we [decided](people-decisions.md) something differently. ## Irresponsibility and meaning The problem with responsibility is that there are *always* [risks](socialrisk.md), which can be [scary](mind-feelings-fear.md). Taking risks is difficult to start, so it's not unnatural for people to run away from it. Most people run from risks, at least up to a point. When pushed enough by exposure to enough [evil](morality-evil.md) or [hardship](hardship.md), a small percentage of people will oppose the abdication of responsibility and push back. If those people, at that moment, are driven by a [principle](values.md) or the [results](results.md), they will find more meaning than the rest of the population. Even without that provocation, anyone will turn around and pursue the difficult things when they realize that we find meaning out of the challenge itself. Except for cats, animals prefer to hunt their food than have it given to them. APPLICATION: We can find meaning anywhere if we think about it long enough, and it contains many shared parallels: - A [scientist](science.md) and [theologian](religion.md) will both find meaning because they increase the store of [human knowledge](understanding.md). - A [soldier](people-conflicts-war.md), of *any* country, will find meaning because they fight to defend their [homeland](groups-large.md). - The [entrepreneur](socialrisk.md) and builder finds meaning by [building something new](creations.md). ## Recovering from meaninglessness We're not [morally obligated](morality.md) to find happiness, but we *are* responsible to find meaning if we are [created beings](creations.md) (i.e., if we believe in [any form of deity](religion.md)). We typically find meaning in something, then forget to continue adding meaning. This creates challenges as we [change](people-changes.md) and convert those meaningful tasks into [habits](habits.md), frequently culminating in a spark of awareness (e.g., a midlife crisis). APPLICATION: Just because we have meaning right now, or have had it for a long time, does *not* mean we'll have it in the future. It requires constantly observing our sense of dissatisfaction to observe that shift, but we'll also detect it when we start doing things with less enthusiasm. When people run from risks long enough to make it a [habit](habits.md), they lose control of themselves. At this point, it's straightforward for them to [feel](mind-feelings.md) they're a victim. In some ways, they're correct, especially if their [family of origin](people-family.md) hadn't taught them how to be responsible. APPLICATION: In a [perfect society](politics-perfectsociety.md), everyone would build their own home, with the only exceptions being strictly by [love](people-love.md) that overlooked others' weaknesses. The one benefit to being a victim is that there's no need to personally [change](people-changes.md). Unfortunately, it leads to a life of existential misery, and typically leads to even more [hardship](hardship.md), since a person will feel more loss from their bad [decisions](people-decisions.md) over the same experience coming by outside [coercion](power.md). The only way to get out of an unpleasant situation is to claim responsibility of what we should have done and still have control over. This can express as performing [basic housekeeping](home-housekeeping.md) or finding something that makes us [happy](mind-feelings-happiness.md). APPLICATION: To find meaning, start with what you can control, then [link it together](mind-creativity.md) with one of your problems. There are too many issues to focus on them exclusively, and we can't do anything about what we *can't* control, but it's not hard to find [things we can do something about](https://stucky.tech/notes/meaning-checklist.md). Some people imagine a broadened scope of existence (e.g., a million years) makes everything meaningless. That's only proving itself true from that specific [perspective](image.md), but doesn't prove anything else. Those people find a paradoxical meaning in defining meaninglessness. APPLICATION: Nihilism implies everything is meaningless because it eventually won't matter. They're only correct if they believe that we live all instances at once. There's quite a lot of meaning to find in self-preservation and [love for others](people-love.md) we can do *right now*. Most nihilists believe in meaninglessness because they prioritize [certainty](understanding-certainty.md) too much. ## The journey vs. the destination We don't find much meaning in the fulfillment of the things we want. Generally, shortly after we celebrate [attaining those things](success-1_why.md), we look immediately for something else to fulfill us. However, we anticipate that we will find *spectacular* meaning in things we do as we [imagine](imagination.md) it in the future. APPLICATION: Enjoyment in something isn't in the attainment, but the effort and [expected results](results.md). For that reason, accomplishing challenging and relatively unnoticed things that help others is far more rewarding than simply acquiring or achieving more. The pathway to fulfilling a [purpose](purpose.md) is *far* more [influential](influence.md) to our sense of meaning than actually getting there. The only requirement is that we [feel](mind-feelings.md) we're making progress toward it, which is usually possible as long as we [hope](understanding-certainty.md) it [can happen](results.md), and it's much easier to maintain hope when we can't [measure](math.md) our goals. APPLICATION: Video games give the [appearance](image.md) of creating results from actions, so they can still provide a sense of meaning even when there aren't any legitimate [results](results.md). Once we've attained something, we're guaranteed to get bored. The only way we'll ever find purpose that provides meaning *after* building something is to find new [purposes](purpose.md) to attain. APPLICATION: It's perfectly possible (and not uncommon) to become wildly [successful](success-1_why.md) and feel absolutely dead inside. It comes through a distinct absence of [love](people-love.md) for others. Ironically, we can find meaning through mindless [habits](habits.md) of hope in things that do *not* contribute whatsoever to a better existence. This distorts the [good life](goodlife.md), since there's only marginal [love](people-love.md) for oneself without producing any tangible benefit to anyone. APPLICATION: If someone finds meaning in something, don't bother trying to change that person's mind. You can potentially [influence](influence.md) them if they want to hear you out, but their [purpose](purpose.md) is already set based on values they've already [imagined](imagination.md) and [committed](people-decisions.md) to [believing](understanding-certainty.md). Too much [specialization](jobs-specialization.md) (which often creates the greatest [consequences](results.md) for a purpose) can also lead to feelings of meaninglessness. APPLICATION: [Purpose](purpose.md) comes through simply acting based on a [prediction of the future](imagination.md), so we can use [technology](technology.md) (i.e., [computers](computers.md)) to reproduce it. However, because meaning incorporates [feelings](mind-feelings.md), the agency of [choice](people-decisions.md), and far more [understanding](understanding.md), there's absolutely no way to automate purpose. This is unfortunate because meaningful purpose is vital to [the good life](goodlife.md). To clarify, though, the greatest meaning comes through genuine, heartfelt, purely selfless [love](people-love.md) shared with others. APPLICATION: We can frequently [feel](mind-feelings.md) meaning from others, which is how we can [know](understanding.md) something was "half-hearted".